Malum

So I have to apply to graduate school before December 15, which is right around the corner. Right now, I'm majoring in psychology, but I have absolutely no idea what I want to do anymore.

"But Malum, why don't you go into psychology?"

Yeah, clearly, but that's not the problem. I was all gun-ho about doing research, but I don't know what I want to do research on. I mean, I'm currently working with music psychology and that has a ton more real world applications than people think, so yeah, I guess I could do that. But do I want to become a music therapist? Researcher? Professor?.. I might want to work for advertising companies or goverment or businesses and get away from academia for once in my life and branch to something new.

That doesn't even count all the research I wanna do in other arts like writing and acting. Evolutionary psychology is also super interesting to me, why do we perceive sopme faces as more attractive as others, what is aesthetically pleasing from human to human as a function of where we came from in our evolutionary history etc etc...

So basically I'm confused as hell and I don't know what i want to do for the rest of my life. My biggest fear is settling on something and letting my ambitions for everything else in life fade into memories of wishful thinking.

I mean, how does anyone really pick their careers? Do you always know? Were you thrust into it? Did it just happen and you said "hell why not"? Did you do it out of necessity?

Choice is what's killing me here. I do believe I'm blessed(add years of hard work) with a skill set that branches into quite a few different fields and it comes to a point like...which one do I pick? It's too f*cking difficult >/

Thus is my rant.