Minstrel's limericks and poetry

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As I travel Valucre and get to know people more, this collection of my lamest tricks will surely grow! ~Minstrel


There was a bad bastard bard named Minstrel
Whose rhymes make gals hot in their apparel
So ho-o-t are their flashes
To air their hot flashes
Which only affirms his nickname Menstruæl.

There exists a celestial being Supernal
Who created Valucre and sky so eternal
But no lass could ever hope
To get Faustus to elope
For he held sky in place with his massive arsenal.

There was a poet named The Hummingbird
Who weaves magic with brevity of word
The secret of his skill
Lies in his quill so ill
Freshly plucked with ink blood from a hummingbird.

There was a miss Enigmatic Surrender
Who serves as Iselyr’s finest bartender
You can ask for a drink
But don’t add in a wink
For service with a smile she’ll surely render.

There was a young girl named Circa Cipher
Who loves people’s psyches to decipher
And if they’re a creeper
She goes even deeper
Picking their brains with Lecter’s caliper.

There was a drifter named Prince Ben o’ Seven
Who powers up fast when he’s fury-driven
If a tank’s your party’s need
Hire Ben with his armoured steed:
A black panzer Hummer from Mercy-Deaths Benz.

There was a girl named Mina Catranides
Who strives to remain calm whatever the stress
For the slightest desire
Will light her dress afire
Revealing hotness hotter than a goddess.

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There was a holy warrior named Rapture
Who stalks the lands for damsels to capture
Releasing them after
To blissful thereafter
All in fulfillment of sacrosanct scripture.


There was a fabulous damsel named Fable
Who is as pretty as she is affable
If treated nice and kind
She might repay in kind
With certain favours far too ineffable.

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There was a secret agent named desolate
Who codes Valucre's interface and template
If you need help or lessons
He's Da Mon for all seasons
Without whose reign the land would turn desolate.

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There was a maiden named animosity
Who brims with Violet verve and curiosity
With a shot in the dark
She went on to embark
On a musical interlewd with virtuosity.

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There was a girl named Beautiful Story
Who sought a parrot for comic parody
A perch on her shoulder
A bird's eye view yonder
Of lands ho-ly and high as her two storeys.

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There was a lone star voyager named spacegy4
Who boldly went where no spaceguy has gone before
On Valucre he arrived
Among its people he thrived
Having found at long last what he was looking for.

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There was a pretty Watcher named Eternity
Who writes roleplay news for the community
Her voyeuristic ways
Earn nothing except praise
For she peeps and records with utmost dignity.

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There was a citizen named carrionjackal
Who carried on being nice like a Dr Jekyll
Until his Lust bounced open
The door to things but Hydden
The least of which was a harrying Ms Marichelle.

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There was a superb storyteller named Nette
Whose prose adorns Valucre like a vignette
While able to pull some strings
To accomplish certain things
Fans like malum still vie to be her favourite marionette.

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There was a Canadian Royalty named malum
Whose country borders on the state of asylum
Just stroking his beard so regal
Can spark riots and upheaval
On top of harem fighting over his kingdom phylum.

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There was a ballerina named Gnatalie
Who started dancing even pre natally
With her beauty refined
She appears not to mind
When Valiants stare at her rather naughtily.

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There was a being named Obsidian Shimmer
Who knows what Kira did last simmering summer
He read her Death Note book
And all those lives she took
And now it's her turn to die to his Reaper Grimmer.

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I run across the field of snowy drifts
That are but the cumulous clouds
And how quickly at my feet form rifts
Revealing the glittering ocean and crowds
Of deciduous and pines, of the Terrenus cliffs!

Ah! If I stay, the boughs will break
But if I run towards where the cirrus art
I can soar as high as the moon's Tranquil Lake...
But no! Nimbus and stratus together fall apart
At my weight? Or the past? A destructive wake?

Dewy crystals by sunlight glow
A quiver of prisms: a supple rainbow
Oh... ?

This must be the Earth's greatest sli--

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If it were a pot of gold, I would have died!

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"Yesterday, and yesterday, and yesterday
Marches by, promising a fairy tale romance
From the moment the darkness first glimpsed her rainbow light
And 'til tomorrow, it'll flicker bright
Lighting fools the way to proper death;
Shine, shine, oh brilliant candle!
Life is but a sheltered Treehouse beneath a passing cloud,
A splendid star that laughs and jaunts his hour upon the sky,
And then winks out at sunlight's dawn...
This is a tale told by a Villain, full of nonsense and pain--
Signifying everything..."

Spoiler:

Playing off Shakespeare's classic contemplative verses:

To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

Macbeth Act 5, scene 5, 19–28

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Is there such thing as artificial nature?
Why, yes, said the little bird.
Just look at a golf course.