This thread reviews movies, video games, books, tech tools, and more. Anyone can post here - simply don't post anything on things you know nothing about, and if you add spoilers to a movie or book, put a warning beforehand. There is no set template for reviewing; you can even put short lists, but no adding useless comments like, "I think Gtalk is cool too."
I will update as frequently as I feel like it.
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Movie: The Fountain
Release date: 2006
Note: This movie is for older people. It will probably bore your kids, and if you're enthralled only by heavy action sequences, gore, and deep thinking doesn't do it for you, then this movie isn't for you. Rated PG-13
Synopsis
This is actually based on a graphic novel of the same name, one you may never have heard of before. Searching for a cure for his ailing wife, a scientist embarks on a quest to find the Tree of Life. What makes this seemingly bland plot interesting is that this movie focuses on three different timelines; namely, past, present, and future. In the past he serves Queen Isabel of Spain, who orders him to find the Tree of Life in order to save them both. In the present, the Tree of Life is the cure for his wife. In the future, he has found the Tree of Life... which, being a very old tree, is dying.
The movie seems to want to incorporate some mythology and philosophy in it, adding in some pretty astounding visuals that often have nothing to do with violence of any kind. Instead, it moves at a steady pace, shifting from timeline to timeline in an effort to weave them all together in a single story about love, death, and immortality.
Pros and Cons
Pros: The movie is, somehow, easy to understand, even with its plot that slowly expands into something totally mind-boggling. The acting is well done (Hugh Jackman and Rachel Weisz), each moving through their environment naturally and fluidly. The music was composed by Clint Mansell of Requiem for a Dream, and fits the movie perfectly with its dramatic, tense sound. Surprisingly, this movie doesn't have much in the way of CG; the big stuff is that of microorganisms, chemical reactions, and so forth. This too is done well and is all the more impressive once you see it.
Cons: Conversely, you might not have a clue as to what's going on, and I guarantee you won't during the first few minutes of the movie. You also might not have a clue what's going on in the end. This movie demands you to pay attention or suffer confusion. You won't find any awesome violence or gore in this movie - there is perhaps two in all, necessary for the plot. And though this movie may not need it, on a basic level there really isn't any character development and you may feel dissatisfied with the conclusion of the whole story - all three of them, in fact. At one point, during what I think is supposed to be rather serious, looks rather cheap and low-budget, to the point that it may actually make you laugh. In fact, this movie was to be inexpensive. You will notice it at least once.
Movie Highlight: the climax. You'll know it when you see it. More would be telling.
Rating: 8/10 Basically, you just need to be a patient person to enjoy the movie. Any flaws it has it easily makes up for in other scenes, and it begs to be re-watched. This is an Aronofsky film - this time around, he dares you to interpret and understand at least half of what's going on.
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Movie: Mirrors
Release date: 2008
Note: This movie is for older people. You may be more excited by the movie if you study mythology on mirrors and ghosts, and this movie is also a remake of the Korean film Into the Mirrors. Rated R
Synopsis
The rare case in which a remake is better than its overseas counterpart, Mirrors focuses on the plight of a guilt-stricken cop who stumbles into some crumbling building and finds that something is very, very wrong with the obnoxious amount of mirrors within. In their warped reflections of times long gone, there are very disturbing images, and that's not all.
The movie is a horror film, but the traditional blood and gore is not so prevalent here as in slasher films like Saw and Scream. It focuses more on the mystery behind the mirrors, rather than shoving massive amounts of red paint into the viewers' faces.
Pros and Cons
Pros: The movie is really kind of creepy. The special effects are fine, and the acting is for the most part good. You will definitely be interested in what the hell is going on with the mirrors, and until the end, you'll probably be enthralled in whatever it is they're after.
Cons: Conversely, you'll laugh near the end. The mirrors' end problem is really ridiculous - ask anyone, it was this that was the movie's ultimate failure. Also, you might not be exactly sure of what the cop feels guilty of. You just know he did something that wasn't very good, and unlike Into the Mirrors which fully incorporates this side plot, Mirrors suggests it and then entirely overlooks it, just enough to make you feel wanting for something that's not coming.
And if you want a stunning conclusion, you won't find it here.
The acting and special effects, while all right, are not spectacular. You may find yourself analyzing and guessing how they did it (and you'll probably be right), but it's fine enough to not detract from the movie itself.
Movie Highlight: The very, very end. Not the stupid end, but the last three seconds of the film. It's funny, and a bit sad.
Rating: 7/10 It's not a bad movie, really, just the end is. It's nice having a creepy movie rather than a blood and gore movie. But it would have been better if they just left the mystery as a mystery.[/quote]
If you want to watch the original Korean movie I have it - legally.
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Movie: Trailer Park of Terror
Release date: 2008
Note: Rated R for massive amounts of gore, explosions, language, and sexuality.
Synopsis
My friends rented this movie in celebration of Cheesy Horror Movie Night, and this movie seemed like a good option to torture ourselves with. What we got instead, was a surprisingly pleasant ride. After the first few minutes, which definitely seemed to be planning nothing great, the movie takes off down a truly morbid path.
A girl, treated rather badly at a white trash trailer park, gets her revenge with the friendly help of some cowboy who could only be Satan. This help, of course, involves killing just about everyone. Fast forward a couple years later, and a group of teenage losers and their teacher are on some sort of field trip. Their bus breaks down of course, and they are led into the same cursed trailer park. Can they escape the douchebag zombies?! Probably not. All the zombies seem to take after Saw's John, snubbing the meaningful appreciation of life and keeping the creative ways to kill people.
The movie is definitely horror with plenty of blood and gore. It's cheesy, without much plot, but it is overall a good movie, worthy of higher praise than it gets on IMDB. If you have a hardy stomach and want to sit back and relax, pop this one in.
Pros and Cons
Pros: I didn't really get scared or anything, but I was raised on horror movies. However, I did get creeped out by a certain fat lady with some sort of fetish for meat. The special effects are okay for what must have been a rushed movie, and there are some very funny parts. The music is good for the movie - you may not like the music, but it fits. There is no story, but in the midst of the chaos, you'll forget all about it and be satisfied that it's about a lot of people getting killed.
Cons: I guess that some women might be offended, but I'd think that would only be hardcore feminists, therefore I wasn't offended in the least. Again, there's no story, it's a pure slasher film in all its surprisingly high quality glory. The movie seems to lose itself as it doesn't tie up any loose ends, but in actuality, there aren't many loose ends anyway. Satan just likes to fool you.
Movie Highlight: There's one part that's hilarious with the quote, "MY PENIS!" It's worth seeing just for this.
Rating: 6.8/10 I wanted to give this a seven, really. For a cheesy movie, it was great. If it had a different title, it might have pulled in more viewers.
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Movie: Ying Xiong aka Hero
Release date: 2002
Note: Rated PG-13 for marital arts violence and some scene of sensuality... and anyone below that age of 12 can't appreciate this truly awesome movie.
Synopsis
This under-advertised movie offers a take on the legend of the attempted assassination of the Qin Emperor in pre-unified China. The assassination attempt is a real story, and cleverly portrayed in this colorful tale.
You probably heard that the Qin Emperor was a cruel tyrant. But, true to history, views on him varied, and those who want to assassinate him view him as that tyrant. A man known only as Nameless (better known as Jet Li), has apparently thwarted an assassination attempt on the emperor in order to earn the honor of supping with him... and getting the chance to kill him. Nameless presents the story of this feat, but the emperor, being no fool, questions his story and presents his own, to which Nameless presents yet another story, and so it goes. And each story is presented in a different color scheme. If you've got terribly weak eyes, this movie might blind you. If you are colorblind, you're in for many shades of gray.
Each tale is quite beautifully told in subtitles with a cast of other complex characters making repeated appearances in different situations. It requires paying attention as the movie may seem confusing, but by the end, you'll understand and appreciate the message this story presents at the end. There are some historical inaccuracies but it's nothing to pick on, because every movie you've seen is ridiculous.
Pros and Cons
Pros: For one, it's got Jet Li. But to go on, the casting is great and so is the acting. The idea of using different colors was brilliant, and every story was obviously created by a mastermind, especially how they all somehow tie into one another. The martial arts are dutifully presented as incredibly beautiful motions of the body, and the music fits well throughout the entire movie.
Cons: Like I said, this movie might blind you, and when it first starts off you might feel hopelessly confused. Try to stay with it. And, you'll hate the ending.
Movie Highlight: The calligraphy in the sand, speaking a single vision and moral. You'll know it when you see it.
Rating: 8/10 The last picture my Chinese art instructor showed us was this movie's promotional poster. I was seriously delighted.
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Movie: The Golden Compass
Release date: 2007
Note: Rated PG-13 for violence and pure suckiness. Anyone younger than 13 will die.
SPOILERS. I'm not holding back.
Synopsis
You wanted it, you asked for it, and you got shafted. Let's ignore the book and see it for just a movie.
Some girl Lyra who doesn't fear a damn thing has a demon, who is, I guess, a familiar of sorts. His name is Pantailamon, Pan for short. Her father is some noble aaaand Lyra is taken for some reason on some expedition to the... frozen north by some cold-looking lady named Ms. Coulter, who has a golden monkey, also a demon. Um, oh, and her friend, Roger, or something, is... missing. So of course, she must find him. Um, because some butler felt like it, she is given an... um... A-leeth-ee-o-meter, which is magic, and gives her psychic visions. So she takes it, and um, after visiting the bears and getting into a big fight between demons, some witches, and humans, she flies off on a flying ship and the movie ends.
Wtf? What happened?
If you were wanting a good movie that stays true to the book you knew and loved, you're in for a big disappointment. This movie is pure crap. Forget about the ending. This movie has none. It eliminated any possibility for a sequel. Also, every scene in the book is switched around and tangled up to squeeze into a little over an hour. In vain. Who did this shit? Oh, Chris Weitz. Whoever he is, he sucks.
Pros and Cons
Pros: Graphics. Yup, that's all. Good idea, horrible execution.
Cons: Oh boy. The acting was sub-par. The music wasn't anything spectacular, the story was just a mess, and the movie just ends with no resolution to much of anything.
Movie Highlight: The bear fight. Was it worth it? I dunno.
Rating: 3/10 If you want to see a good movie that you don't need to the book to understand and yet fulfills every expectation of awesomeness, go see LOTR again.[/quote]
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Movie: Miracle on 34th Street
Release date: 1947
Note: Unsure of the rating, but probably PG or G. There is a 1997 remake that is not so good; typically black and white, but I believe it also has a color version.
Synopsis
Since it's the Holidays, let's put up a good one! Miracle on 34th Street is a heartwarming movie about a girl skeptical of the existence of Santa, raised by a very realistic woman who works as a manager or something of the like at Macy's. When their parade Santa threatens to fail them all, in comes a cheerful man whom she immediately hires as emergency backup. Yet as it progresses closer and closer to that special day, she notices something a bit awry with this bearded man. Who is he really, and what of those who don't believe at all? Can he make the wishes and hopes of the people come true?
Pros and Cons
Pros: To this day, this classic remains high-quality in nearly every aspect.
Cons: As is to be expected, some things will always remain unanswered when it comes to a believable existence of Santa Claus. Most of the acting is quite good, there's not much music where it's not needed anyway, and there's no color, but like I said, I have a copy that is in color, so suffice to say there's another one out there. There's just one problem I had with this movie and that's the girl's Christmas wishlist. C'mon! Santa only goes so far, yo.
Movie Highlight: Looks like the mail service is rockin' after all.
Rating: 8.5/10 So delightful!
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Movie: Prancer
Release date: 1989
Note: Unsure of the rating, but probably PG. Also comes in black and white and color.
Synopsis
Another holiday movie! Whoo! This one is about a girl who still believes in Santa Claus despite a rather downtrodden life. Walking home from school, she becomes worried when a reindeer prop comes crashing down - the reindeer Prancer, to be specific. What do you know, a little later she finds a real reindeer, and believes it to be the real Prancer who somehow got lost and shot down from Santa's sleigh while he was out testing his ride or something. Persevering to restore Prancer to health, she attempts to hide the reindeer from all those who don't believe, including her strict dad who plans to send her away from home to the "better life". Can she save Prancer? Can she make the lives of people around her better?
Pros and Cons
Pros: Although not as good or believable as Miracle on 34th Street, Prancer is still a very nice holiday movie. The acting is okay, no music, not like it needs it anyway. You might think the girl is rather... odd, but hey, she's a kid. How would you act?
Cons: Again there's that "yeah right" stuff in there, and it kind of stretches it, but let's not be stingy. Some things go unresolved, but that's life.
Movie Highlight: Put down the newspaper and look outside, sir.
Rating: 7.5/10 Happy Holidays![/quote]
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I'm so lazy, so let's just list some nice holiday movies to watch.
A Christmas Story (live action)
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer (3d stop motion animation)
A Charlie Brown Christmas (2d animation)
The Nightmare Before Christmas (3d stop motion animation)
T'was the Night Before Christmas (2d animation)
Miracle on 34th Street (live action)
A Christmas Carol (versions can come inn live action or 2d animation)
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
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Title: Wizard's First Rule (of The Sword of Truth series)
Author: Terry Goodkind
Genre: Hardcore fantasy
Bestseller? Yes, Nationwide.
Summary: The young man Richard Cypher lives a simple life as a woods guide in the peaceful Westland. His life, however, is disrupted when his father is gruesomely murdered. In his quest to discover his father's murderer, he encounters a woman hailing from the mysterious and magical Midlands. Naming herself Kahlan Amnell, she claims to search for a powerful wizard to cease the threat slowly growing over the land. That threat is Darken Rahl, a wizard of extreme power further strengthened by brutal and vicious men and women of untamed talents, all geared toward the destruction of the land. Faced with little choice, Richard agrees to help her. Soon, any skepticism he might have had is washed away as he faces down expert killers and a savage beast he has never seen before.
Upon meeting with Richard's old friend, Zeddicus Zu'l Zorander, more secrets are revealed, and Richard is bestowed with the powerful sword forged by a nearly-extinct line of wizards - the Sword of Truth. This weapon, rather than the wizard, is the true means of stopping Darken Rahl, and it can only be wielded by one person - Richard, now the Seeker of Truth. Yet, as Zedd states, "Nothing is ever easy."
Thus, Richard, Kahlan, Zedd, and a powerful man Chase are led on an adventure that takes them through everything from the Land of the Dead to a castle of splendor where Darken Rahl awaits.
Is it good? The Sword of Truth consists of about eleven books. This is the first of those eleven, and likely the best. It is claimed to be another version of Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time, yet while the Wheel of Time is known for being haphazardly boring for the fist half of the book, Wizard's First Rule fashions a steady grip in the first three pages. And it doesn't let up. The magic is well-established with the right amount of mystery, much of which is continued, explained, and referenced in later books, forcing you to buy more which was probably Goodkind's blatant plan.
The cast of characters are realistic, developing over the course of the story, each with their own personal flaws and dilemmas. Some you'll love, some you'll hate. This book is also rated R for the massive amounts of blood, especially nearing the end; this book is not for the faint of heart.
The writing itself is vivid, giving detail without going overboard. Goodkind seems to well keep track of what his characters look like (unlike Salvatore's stories), and is accomplished at shifting moods and tones to where it fits in the book. Repetition is there and put to use as well, although while I found it stylish and clever, another critic found it annoying. This is where individual taste comes in. Overall, though, I found the story to be epic. As a standalone, though, it just doesn't do it, because many things are meant to be completed over the next eleven books. Save your money.
What Else? This book inspired a TV series called The Legend of the Seeker. Hardcore book fans will be disappointed, but for casual writers and those who just want another view of the story may like it. Saturdays, 8pm Pacific.
Similar stories? Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time, Terry Brook's Sword of Shannara series, compiled in three books.
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Title: Assassin's Creed
Producers: Ubisoft
Genre: Sci-fi/modern/medieval
Platform Playstation 3 and computer.
Premise: You are a regular dude captured by a pair of scientists who hook you up to what is known as the Animus. Through the Animus, you are synced to a distant ancestor, one known as the assassin Altair. You relive his memories, his actions and deeds; basically, you are him, living his life while dealing out harsh justice to oppressors of the people. That is, you are going to kill guards and Templars, and you are going to do it by stabbing every one of them in the back with your trusty knife and sometimes your sword.
Assassin's Creed is not a game for those with a lust for quick action; this is more of a stealth game. If you want to go around killing everything that moves, you may want to try Bioshock; otherwise, you'll lose to this game pretty quickly. If you have patience and enjoy stabbing the unsuspecting while sneaking around, this game is pure fun. The graphics are beautiful, but you have to make sure you have a high-end computer or a Playstation, otherwise you'll never get to play this game. The computer recommendations are demanding, and the game will play better if it's faster than the minumum. Even so, my computer goes over the minimum requirements, and the game has a tendency to lag if I don't shut off every other program. Not only that, you definitely need a game controller (Xbox 360) to really enjoy it.
The voice acting and storyline are both great and the environments are expansive. You even get to ride a horse. But the first time you play it, you'll probably spend quite a while searching the manual for instructions. You won't get them. The manual is useless; it doesn't bother telling you how to save (you can't; you need to find a checkpoint), or what these flags are for that you end up collecting (these save your game; dunno what else they do). The tutorial they give you at the beginning is the most help you'll get; otherwise, you have to figure out everything by yourself. You get the feeling they didn't port everything over to the computer quite right; still, killing people is fun, and being an assassin just rocks.
You'll spend most of the time as Altair, completing objective that involve... well, killing people. You're a good guy, and you want to kill all bad guys, although the game doesn't restrict you from killing the occasional innocent. Portions of the game involve running from the guards, hiding in haystacks, jumping rooftops, blending with the crowd and swordfighting, all of which are quite fun. I haven't finished the game yet but so far I'm not disappointed aside from the fact that the game lags if I have any other program running besides it. And that the manual sucks.
Is it worth my money? If you can get it for the console do so; if not, make sure your computer is up-to-date and get an Xbox 360 controller. The Director's Cut edition for PC is out for $30, and you can play it on Vista and XP. Just keep in mind; patience is a virtue.
I don't want it. Any other games? Any of the Thief games I've heard are similar and quite fun. I think the most recent is Thief III, which I believe is for the computer as well. And in that game you're not quite as moral.[/quote]
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Name: BudK
Location: Online at http://www.budk.com
They Sell: Guns, swords, T-shirts, knicknacks, pointy sharp objects
Products made by: Anyone and everything from Kit Rae to Boris Vallejo to United
What for?: Let's face it. We've all got a thing for sharp, pointy blades. We all love dragons, and things with dragons on them. We all love guns and things condoning delicious violence. We all have a thing for shiny, sparkling objects. BudK has it all, and assuming their site isn't down at the most inconvenient times, it's just a mouse-click away.
BudK offers so many things, it's impossible to name them all. Swords, both high-quality, battle-ready and sharp as your butcher knife? Check. Swords, low-quality and dull as a spoon? Check. Cool T-shirts? Check. How about hats, lighters, pocketwatches, guns, rifles, and whips? All checked. How about a working site? Usually checked. I don't know why they're not up now.
BudK will mail you a magazine loaded with all their latest weaponry at the best of prices provided you fill out a free form entailing maybe you'd like to give them your money, and it just might be one of the best magazines you'll get all year. The products are usually very good, always interesting, and at a good price for what you'll end up getting. You can even find full-tang swords at less than $60. Truly battle-ready ones are pricey, but you won't find them any cheaper at the local sword shop. Looking for carbon steel? Maybe damascus? They have it. Just save up, call and mail, and have it shipped to you at a reasonably fair price.
For Bleach fans, they have an Ichigo sword. On clearance. Yes, they have a huge clearance section online full of just about everything.
Once you order something from them, they'll continue mailing you magazines for three or four months. If you order something, they'll include with your purchase a gift certificate taking away five or ten dollars off your next purchase so long as it's over $60 prompting you to quickly buy something before the thirty-day expiration date comes to pass. They have the right idea; I have two swords from them and am very, very happy, although broke.
Their shipping? Give them about 2 weeks and it should arrive at your doorstep, in shape and ready to wear, open, or swing at a tree, depending on what you got.
The bad things? Although they do have high-quality swords, they don't have such a wide selection of them. If you're the casual collector of anything shiny, then they have it, but don't expect to be able to cut a tree in half without breaking your brand-new Excalibur replica. BudK will tell you how far down the tang goes, and usually, unless it states otherwise, it doesn't really go down farther than a couple inches or so. They give you measurements of blade and handle besides. BudK is really a sword shop; while you can get clothing and lighters and other interesting things, there are probably better places to look.
Is it worth my money? Everyone I know has never been disappointed, considering the wide network of craftsmen letting them sell their stuff. They never seem to really run out of products either.
I don't want to pay for their magazine subscription. You don't! At all. You just pay for their crazy clawed gauntlets you know you want. Don't cut off your hand.
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I think Gtalk is cool too.
My friend's dad has one... wait! NO USELESS COMMENTS.
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Movie: Watchmen
Release date: 2009
Note: This movie is based on a famous graphic novel. You either hate it or love it. You will hate it if you're a fanboy/fangirl, you might like it if you enjoy comics, you will detest it if you come in expecting Batman-Spiderman superhero fights. THIS MOVIE HAS NO SUPERHERO VS SUPERVILLAIN FIGHTS. It does, however, have Rorschach. Rated R
Synopsis
This is based on a graphic novel of the same name, one you probably have heard of before. Based in an alternate history of America, superheroes existed, and they were the reason for our victory in World War II. However, these superheroes are actually normal people with above-average capabilities and in one guy's case, destructive craziness.Notable ones are Silk Spectre, the Comedian, Nite Owl and Ozymandias. Only one has any actual "powers", this one being Doctor Manhattan, who can kill you by pointing at you.
Their reward for saving our asses is their vigilante work being outlawed, so now they all live fairly normal lives except for Rorschach, the mask-wearing vigilante wanted by the law. When one of the superheroes is found dead, the movie takes off (slowly), spinning the stories of the superheroes who can't be anymore and culminating into a conspiracy that is sure to elicit a "wtf" reaction at the end.
Pros and Cons
Pros: The acting is great, and the few fight scenes are enjoyable. The story is fairly easy to understand, and philosophy buffs may find conversation material here. Those who enjoy a more realistic setting will appreciate the characters, all of who are flawed just like regular humans. Likewise, those who enjoy deep characterization will appreciate the time the movie takes to set up the characters, especially the main character Rorschach and how he got to be how he is.
Cons: This movie is three hours long and if you end up hating the first hour, leave, because it won't get better for you. There are a very few plot holes and flaws picky people may want to point out. Those who want to see fierce, bloody action sequences will be bored to death, and those expecting the parallel story and extra subplots found in the graphic novel will be sorely disappointed. Like they say, you either hate it or love it.
Also, I found the music unfitting. There is no The Beginning Is the End is the Beginning or whatever song you heard in the first trailer.
Movie Highlight: "I have to visit men's room."
Rating: 8/10 Basically, you just need to be a patient person to enjoy the movie without expecting The Dark Knight twin and not be a frothing fanboy. Will it be epic? It just depends on personal taste. i would call it epic, others will call it epic, others will call it very nice, and others will say it's a horrible, horrible overrated farce. At the time of this review though, it's 197 in the top 250 movies of all time.
Do I Have to Read the Graphic Novel?: No. Just pay attention.
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