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Valucre

Raspberry LA

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  • Content count

    154
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About Raspberry LA

  • Rank
    Citizen

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Chick
  • Location
    Inside a haze of Red Bull
  • Interests
    Tons! I'm very interesting!
  • Occupation
    Crappy desk job

Recent Profile Visitors

405 profile views
  1. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    A safe house would be an awesome thing. Iani wondered silently how such a place could exist, and whether or not it could be replicated. If one safe place against all this crazy magic could be created, even if by accident, didn't that mean more could be created on purpose? Maybe even eventually enough to 'fix' the city and make it habitable again? The panther-kin smelled a much bigger business opportunity in this concept than just looting old marketplaces. It probably involved using magic somehow. He'd have to find a spell-slinger and ask some questions. Maybe set one up as a partner. A prospectus began to write itself in his head. If Iani had still been in possession of a human face, his lips would have pursed with indignity. Instead, his ears flattened against his head and his tail twitched. He looked down and off to his left, muttering. "I coulda raked that lock. I just didn't feel like it. Humph."
  2. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    Iani stuffed the jar into a pocket on the inside of his coat, his tail twitching happily. "You good at pleasing the ladies? Well let's just say there's always room for improvement! It's got more get-up-and-go than a Last Chance whore with your coin purse in her brasserie!" He rummaged through the crate a bit more, to see if there were any other come-ups. "So as you can imagine, it's pretty dear to purchase, especially around some of the more... conservative... ports" He stopped suddenly, looking at Goderic. "Or, you know, I guess it works the same if you're into guys too. Takes all kinds, no judgement. My bad." Iani made a motion as if to go for the falling chest, but Goderic had it so he pulled up short so as not to crash into the kid like some stage comedy skit. "Woo! Nice find, boss!" he whistled. He would have mentioned something about this being their lucky day, but some things were dangerous to say out loud. You could never tell what malicious - but uncreative - spirit of ill omen might be listening in. "We crack that bitch open, that's what!" Iani laughed and leaned in to inspect the chest. "Or we pick it, but that's so much less cathartic. Who's got a hammer?"
  3. Raspberry LA

    Feedback - new member guide

    Just started poking around, but my first thought is that each of the bannered articles could use a link back to the original guide page. I mean, I like my back button as much as anyone, but it'd still be handy. 😊
  4. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness OOC

    😗 Of course! 😏
  5. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    Iani walked very carefully through the ruins, as if he didn't quite trust the ground to still be the ground when his next step got to it. Crucible followed closely behind Godric. "I can tell you the difference. Bandits - and pirates - prey on their own. Whatever people make up their community, their alliance, their whathaveyou social construct, those are targets of banditry. Adventurers and privateers prey on Others. Of course, what would we be if we sped on over to Genesaris and started a murder campaign? So maybe it's more complicated than that. But not by a whole hell of a lot. Plus, you gotta remember, everyone is the hero in their own story. Every bandit has a sob story, every pirate has a personal or societal betrayal, every mad wizard has a grand cause. The terms 'good guy' and 'bad guy' are created, culturally, more or less by fiat. Because the big group of 'people' at large is kinda dumb, and can't handle the idea that every person is a colorful painting. They need black and white, or their whole collective little lives turn into cats and dogs living together - mass hysteria." Iani clambered over a pile of rocks and surveyed the marketplace. "I could go on. But then nobody'd buy my Politics Correspondence Course. This is just a demo." The panther-kin's eye strayed to a pile of broken crates; he moved a rotted board to peek inside. "Hey! Ginseng!" he chortled, raising a misshapen root contained in a stoppered glass bottle for everyone to see. "Score!" Crucible nibbled on Godric's pant leg affectionately.
  6. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness OOC

    Star-knuckles please!! YAY!
  7. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness OOC

    I'm thinking a set of Starmetal brass knuckles. 😀 If I don't get to pick what kind of weapon, tho, I'd take Dlarun instead. Iani'd still get some use out of it if it shows up in like a greatsword or a maul. Sorry for the delay, my personal morning wakeup time got totally shattered yesterday. I'm going to try to get a post up now!
  8. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    The world flipped again and Iani suddenly had nothing to grip. While it really shouldn't have made a difference, the panther-kin's instinct functioned properly when falling in this direction. His body twisted in mid-air and he landed on his feet, his knees bending to suck up as much of the impact as possible. He imagined an older, greyer version of himself getting around with a cheap metal walker and made a mental note to take better care of his joints in the future. Crucible, meanwhile, hopped off of Godric's pack and nuzzled the back of the young man's head. It would be safe to assume that was goat for "thanx fam!"
  9. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    For whatever reason, Iani had always imagined anti-gravity as a force that would cause one to slowly float into the air like a hot air balloon. In hindsight, he couldn't tell you exactly what had given him the impression that anti-gravity would have any Delta V value other than exactly -9.8m/s/s. His stomach lurched as his feet went out from under him, all thoughts of lunch vanishing in a cloud of nauseating vertigo. Nearby, Crucible let out a panicked bleat as he, too, was propelled upwards. Iani flailed and managed to grab the edge of a crumbling balcony with his right hand without dislocating his shoulder. With his left hand, he snatched up Crucible by a hind leg. He dangled there for a moment, his muscles straining, then swung Crucible "up" onto the bottom of the concrete. The goat landed on his feet, an upside-down absurdity in the face of extreme danger. Iani grabbed the ledge with his now-free hand and contemplated the wisdom of trying to pull himself "up" too. His inner ear, having had enough of this nonsense, sent a flurry of conflicting signals, which caused the panther-kin to loose his breakfast. The disgusting emission flew off into the sky. "Have I mentioned yet that I don't like this place??" he yelled, wishing desperately for a mint.
  10. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness OOC

    Also, how the hell do I delete a spoiler tag? 😫😀
  11. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    Iani's sharp ears registered the subtle sounds of the attack before it came; he executed a forward roll, leaving the enormous fox snapping at a cloud of dust behind him. The panther-kin stood and whipped around, catching sight of his adversary for the first time. "Holy shit!" was all he could think to say. He'd seen foxes before, but never at 5x magnification. His brain spun into all new directions, imagining centipedes the size of weasels and weasels the size of ostriches and ostriches the size of... well, ostriches were horrifying enough at ostrich-sized. The fox caught sight of Crucible; smaller and more delicious-looking than Iani. The beast made ready to pounce on its new snack-pack. Iani drew his daggers and activated the runes on their hilts. His form blurred and he crossed the ten feet between himself and the attacking megafauna nearly instantly, his blades flashing downward on his arrival. It was a fast turnaround, but even really big foxes have great reaction times and it barely managed to raise its mystical barrier in time to deflect Iani's steel. One dagger bounced back harmlessly, but the other simply had its trajectory adjusted and slid down the foxes side, creating a nasty-looking gash that immediately began to gush blood. Crucible bleated, and dove into a bush. Iani spun his blades in his hands and slashed at the fox, but each of his blows was repulsed by its magical defenses. It snapped its powerful jaws at the panther-kin and advanced through the flurry of useless strikes, forcing Iani to give ground until his back was against the trunk of a large tree. Thinking it had its prey cornered, the fox made another lunge, hoping to disembowel Iani and feast on his hot, steaming, tasty innards. Iani made an impressive vertical leap, his booted feet barely tickling its scruff as its snout impacted the tree. The fox's yelp of surprise and pain was cut short as Iani landed on one of the fox's barrier-plates. The magic wasn't strong enough to cancel out moving body physics; the fox's head was driven to the ground and there was a sickening crunch as its neck, forced to bend in exactly the wrong direction, snapped.The creature flopped for a second, still spewing blood from its side, then lay still. "Hokay, so," Iani panted, "I guess lunch is taken care of. Anyone know how to field strip one of these things?"
  12. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness OOC

    I was all like "foxes?" and then I re-read and I guess I mistook the part under the ~~ for a signature and my eyes just skipped it. Like, three more times!
  13. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness OOC

    Today, tomorrow, and wednesday are my days off, which means I'll probably only be able to get one post in each day. Usually right around this time. Lots going on out here!
  14. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    "Acid rains, ice storms, and fire tornadoes? How does the Ministry of Tourism spin that, I wonder?" Iani chewed on that thought for a bit, trying out a a few lame slogan in his head: 'Bring your kids to see DystopiaLand!', 'The wildest safari you'll ever take!', and 'Experience the history!' were all he could come up with. None of them were very funny, so he discarded them with a soft growl and didn't give them voice. He hated being stumped on a joke. Iani let that one pass too. His superhuman punchline ability was frustratingly on the fritz; he surmised that he must already be dealing with some nefarious magical effects. The panther-kin's tail twitched in annoyance. "This place sucks," he muttered. "The monsters have always been here. We kicked their asses back in the day so we could build cities and farms and stuff; so sure, when a town dies out, the monsters move back in. But I don't think the monsters can wipe out a city on their own. I mean, the surest way to make a bunch of assholes work together is to give them a common enemy, especially one that's dumber and meaner than they are. That's the first lesson of politics. I have a correspondence course, if you're interested..." Iani ducked under a low branch as he spoke, and when he straightened up, the first vestiges of the ruins emerged from the foliage. Iani stopped and stared; he had never seen anything so ominous or forlorn.
  15. Raspberry LA

    Pursuing madness

    "You heard the man, Cruci. Run silent from this point out." Iani patted his pygmy goat and followed the Captain. "I've seen it on a map. I only hit up the Sea of Regrets once, as an ill-advised evasive tactic, and boy howdy is it aptly named. Almost ended up with a mutiny on that one." Iani took a wide step over a fallen log; Crucible simply bounced over it like his little legs were made of springs. "Sure we do. Whatsit called, I forget, but it's that thing that's magical and really valuable. You know, that thing that all those other guys came after that one time but nobody heard from again? The big burly guys, kind of rough, had a spellcaster with them? Yeah them. We're after that thing. Obviously." Iani's chatter was relaxed, but his gold eyes constantly scanned the surrounding landscape. Under his hat, his ears pivoted left and right to pinpoint the various wildlife noises that made their way through the trees.
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