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Yh'mi: Lirrey Lines OOC

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There's always the option of just leaving the poor girl. XD

Speaking of!

 I do genuinely appreciate the call for skipping. As you all know, I do struggle keeping up with my own constraints. Considering I literally forgot to press send on my post kinda says a lot..(It was done I swear). I know how frustrating it can be to have that one guy/gal who never makes a status post of their goings on and ghosts the campaign, and that is mostly because it's usually me. I will try to do better in the future. Still, it's good to know the show will go on here if I'm absent. ❤️

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On 6/8/2019 at 7:11 PM, 1ionFang said:

Hey guys i was curious to know what you thought about that last post. Maybe a critique? Im trying to improve/change my writing.

Any specific critique you are looking for? What exactly were you trying to improve?


I enjoyed the post all the way through, especially the tidbits concerning what Karuna and the mystery man thought about the other characters. The flow was good too and it was an easy read since I knew exactly what was going on. I also enjoyed how the mystery man has been interacting with the group too since I am curious why he has a house here in Yh'mi and what he is actually here for. Got me hooked on this arc at least.

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Thank you! Well I suppose grammar is my main enemy here. Also heightening my vocabulary to more accurately describe what I want to portray while having a more figurative presence? To use when I want to portray feelings/actions that elude my ability to objectively describe. Like similes and metaphors, Without sounding overbearing I guess. 

Readable, easy to understand, and captivating were also what I was going for so that's good to know! 

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